Our weekly look at the happenings on the civilized and controlled world of sports internet message boards.

ESPN.com - Chicago Bears: "This board is nothing more than a few internet tough guys who didn't know what a real football team looked like until THE DALLAS COWBOYS came to "the windy city" last night!! btw, why do they call it the 'windy city' ?? it must be all the blowhards in your rat hole of a town!!!" - symdev

BengalsZone: "They are starting to catch on about the Bungles. They are starting to realize that your team is a fake. There starting to understand that your 11-5 season was a fluke ... They are saying that your team is soft. No heart! So were back to the same thing. The bungles suck! I can't wait to see what felon you draft to help your team next year!!!!

LOL. Enjoy your view from the bottom!" - chopjaw

DawgBones - Cleveland Browns: "Anyone want to join me in a shot of Johnnie Walker Black because this team SUCK so fucking bad. I'm going to do it at 8:15pm Eastern Time. Everyone grab a shot - and we'll drink our sorrows together." - Soup

ChargerTalk: "It wont do much good. Spilled milk is already on the floor BUT you might feel better if you sign this petition. FireNorv.net" - bluehair

DaBearz: "Cut everyone. No passion missed tackles dropped passes fumbles inteceptions. CUT EVERYONE START OVER" - Opie and Anthony

ESPN.com - NFL: "Texans deserve an apology. The texans were laughed at and berated by all the talking heads when they drafted mario williams...

Doesn't look like that was such a bad choice after all now does it.

Reggie bush is easily the most wildly overrated player in the last 5 years. He's Eric metcalf... that's it" - LouOwnsDusty

PurplePride - Minnesota Vikings: "I am at the end of my proverbial rope watching this inept franchise bumble and stumble there way every week, season after miserable season. But despite all this I will continue to be a fan till the day I die, which will be probably 10 years sooner from all the aggravation the purple gang has sent my way.

I am convinced Childress is a douchebag to add onto the pile of crap ... I have resigned myself to accept the fact I am doomed to walk out of the sports bar I go to every Sunday (because I live in Jersey) to watch the hapless Vikes feeling like a idiot with a Adrian Petersen jersey on." - mamaluke

ESPN.com - NCAA Football: "Is Bulluck gay? Did anyone see that post-game on-the-field interview with Keith Bulluck? He sounds really gay...like a butch Pookie with a bandana." - Ihatefairweathers

SaintsReport: "the defense played good....kinda. if you would have told me we would have given up only 24 offensive points with 5 turnovers, less than 300 yds total offense & less than 100 rushing yds... I would have said you were crazy ... Sure we gave up a kind of long touchdown pass & we let them on the next possession after we took the lead run it down our throats to regain the lead....but all in all this defensive performance put us in a position to win." - greenparrot

RealRamsFans: "What this team needs: We need a Priest or a Rabbi or both and throw in a Profit and Exorcist to boot.

Have them bless the whole locker room with a 55 gallon drum of Holy water, each player, the stadium, the players homes, family , clothing.

Another 55 gallon drum for the coaches, their families, homes, cars kids, etc." - gunite

The best of the Monday sports blogs, including Bianca Gascoigne

- Apparently, Bills fans still support O.J. (Six Pack Sports Report)

- Utah's governor is a fan of extreme sports. Which seems odd. (Shakedown Sports)

- Recapping the week in college fantasy football. (Pre Pro Sports)

- Bugs & Cranks takes on an epic endeavor - picking the greatest Cubs playoff teams of the century. (Bugs & Cranks)

- Pictures of the Angels' Vlad Guerrero pouring champagne on a male porn star. Or something like that. (Sports Unfiltered)

- Sadly, the Rams were, um, not good yesterday. (Ramblin' Fan)

- I don't follow the English Premier League, but it seems as if Chelsea's new manager has an insane wife who likes to drink pee and be spanked. (100 % Injury Rate)

- RFK Stadium, gone forever. Players like Nook Logan are upset about it: "This place sucks," he said, obviously holding tears back. (Babes Love Baseball)

- The best player performances of the weekend, equated to sexual conquests. (More Credible)

If there's one thing I've learned about St. Louis sports fans while growing up and living here, it's this: winning isn't enough. If you don't do it their way, you'll never be accepted.

Just ask Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa, who has never been fully espoused in St. Louis. After leading an 83 win team to a World Series victory last season, you would think that the entire city would, at long last, embrace him. It hasn't happened. Unbelievably, there were/are fans (message board types) who refuse to appreciate the championship, saving their joy for the day LaRussa manages his last Cardinals game.

This season, with every starting position player and their two best pitchers being injured, the Cards were remarkably in the N.L. Central race in September before bowing out. Still, calls for LaRussa's ouster were being hailed in June and July.

On the message board Cards Clubhouse, this is but a very small sample of what was being said at that board about him mere months after leading the team to a World Series title:

"He has wore out his welcome in my mind and I wouldnt mind seeing him being fired tomorrow ... Scott Rolen hates and Now I and Albert Pujols hate you."

"He's been making poor management decisions just like that for the last year and a half."

"In my mind, he never was a great manager, the players made him look great. Now, that he doesn't have the players, his 'coat of armor' is very thin, or never was there. Subject at hand!.. Fire the guy..."

"La Russa only wins on talent, anyone could do better then him, he over manages, and it hurts him."

Would you like to know why St. Louisans don't like Tony LaRussa? It's simple, really. There are two reasons.

1) His use of bench players. LaRussa will often sit a regular and play a bench player if he has superior career numbers against that night's starting pitcher. This drives fans here nuts, for reasons known only to their them. A regular could be hitting .022 against a certain pitcher, and a reserve .734, and if LaRussa started the player hitting .734, it's an outrage.

But that's not the main reason. The main reason fans here don't like LaRussa is this:

2) He's not Whitey Herzog.

The same Whitey Herzog who is the epitome of a gutless quitter. 80 games into the 1990 season, the Cardinals had a record of 33-47 ... and Herzog quit, because he couldn't hack it anymore.

Five seasons previous, Herzog got himself ejected from game 7 of the World Series because he was still angry at a call from Game 6. He went into the game unprepared, unfocused and killed his team by choosing to blame the umpire, Don Denkinger, instead of moving on:

"The Cardinals made their frustrations clear throughout the game. ABC television cameras caught Herzog screaming and belittling Denkinger from the Cardinals' dugout throughout the contest ... Herzog even went so far as to directly tell Denkinger that had he gotten "the call" right in Game 6, the Cardinals wouldn't have been subjected to a seventh game in the first place."

Does anyone believe for one second LaRussa would do this? After Detroit's Kenny Rogers blantantly cheated in game 2 of last year's World Series, LaRussa wouldn't let his team dwell on that after they lost. They just moved on to game 3. Herzog couldn't move on, and this was a game 7.

Twice, the White Rat (an appropriate nickname) took his ball and went home like a child. He should forever be remembered for his cowardice in this city, but he's worshipped above any sports figure save Stan Musial.

Which brings us to the St. Louis Rams and their head coach, Scott Linehan. After yesterday's humiliating defeat, 24-3 to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, it's pretty evident where this season is headed for the team. Straight in the garbage can.

And you can thank Scott Linehan for that. Of course the team is going to suffer after losing Orlando Pace and Tye Hill with injury. But it goes beyond that. The offensive play-calling is beyond drab and confusing, the special teams are horrible and the defense is one of the worst tackling units ever assembled.

Most of this has to fall on Linehan's shoulders. He looks scared and confused. Watch him on the sidelines, and he simply sits there with a blank look on his face, clutching his play sheet like Rain Man when he watches People's Court.

At one point in the game, with the Rams down 14-3 and Tampa Bay getting the ball on offense, the miraculous happened and Linehan started yelling and clapping his hands, doing his best cheerleader routine, trying to light a fire under the team's belly. A few plays later, the Buccaneers scored a touchdown.

But that was a rare moment of Linehan exuberance. Maybe the Bucs scored because Rams players were trying to get their minds around the fact that Scott Linehan is actually a living, breathing soul who has the capability to move his arms, legs and mouth.

And you know what? Rams fans deserve this. They deserve every last bit of the mediocre, excruciatingly boring Scott Linehan era. An era that has explosive offensive players all over the offense who can't score a touchdown. An era that has seen him hire a special teams coach who at this time last year was coaching high school kids.

I make no apologies for the fact that I was, and still am, an enormous Mike Martz supporter. I loved the guy. Because I happen to like guys who say, "Fuck you, I'm doing it my way," no matter what the circumstances are. And that was Martz's greatest, yet most confounding quality. He said, "Fuck you." In fact, he said it so much, he got himself fired.

But despite what mediocre broadcasters like Tom Jackson, comically inept websites like Football Outsiders and ill-informed fans like the ones we have in St. Louis believe, at his core, Martz was a hell of a coach. And facts bear that out.

Martz engineered the greatest offense in football history. His 56 wins are the third most in the history of the Rams franchise, behind Chuck Knox's 57 and John Robinson's 79. And among head coaches who were at the helm for at least 50 games, Martz's .609 winning percentage trails only Knox's .737 and George Allen's .708.

And one thing was for sure: Martz was never boring. He was also extremely tough on his team, and quarterbacks in particular. He was excitable, showed intense emotion and had the kind of arrogance that the media hates and many fans embrace. But not in St. Louis.

Why, you ask? Again, it's quite simple. He didn't do it the St. Louis way. He didn't cry like Dick Vermeil. He threw the ball - a lot. He challenged any plays on the field his players asked him to, citing his trust for them. He would often burn all three of the team's timeouts with time left in the first quarter. And he challenged the fat slobs that represent the media, who would roast him when he didn't give them the answers they wanted. And they wanted traditional, grind it out football, like all media does.

Never mind his record setting offenses, his Super Bowl and playoff appearances, and that he is the only coach in the history of the National Football League to take an 8-8 team on the road and win a playoff game. He didn't do it the way St. Louis fans wanted to - he called timeouts and threw challenge flags, and in St. Louis, you don't call timeouts and throw challenge flags.

Here, you run the ball up the middle and fall down after hitting the back of the offensive lineman. Here, you keep the challenge flag in your pocket. And you damn well better have every timeout at the end of the first half.

So instead of having a coach who takes risks, a coach who says "fuck you," a coach who does what he believes is the right thing to do instead of doing what everybody else wants him to do, we have Scott Linehan.

A boring, unprepared, perplexed, drab, possibly autistic Scott Linehan. And Rams fans, you deserve every ounce of this. Even though the team can't score touchdowns, the special teams are an embarrassment and the defense can't tackle, it sure is better to lose with Linehan than win with Martz, right?

Because at least Scott Linehan loses with all his timeouts left. And Lord knows that's the most important thing in this town.

Coming off a World Series title, the St. Louis Cardinals looked poised to make another run at the playoffs, continuing their streak of reaching the postseason every year this decade. Then, the first game happened.

Pitcher Chris Carpenter, their ace and a former Cy Young winner, lasted all of 6 innings before his season ended. Carpenter hurt his elbow, and ended up having reconstructive elbow surgery, sidelining him for at least a year.

That malady started a trend that saw every starter except one from that game spend time on the disabled list. Five of those players ended up having season ending surgery at some point. Only Albert Pujols avoided the D.L., but he played most of the season battling leg and elbow injuries, and it looks as if his season could be over now as well.

It wasn't only the starters that were injured. Valuable bench players, relievers and other starting pitchers were injured at some point during the season.

Here is a look at every starting player, followed by starting pitchers, relievers and bench players who have been injured or spent time on the D.L. this season.

Starting Line-Up

C - Yadier Molina: The Cards catcher fractured his left wrist in May, landing him on the D.L. for nearly the entire month of June.

1B - Albert Pujols: Never missed significant time until recently, but he has played through various leg and elbow injuries, and now he may be done for the rest of this season.

2B - Adam Kennedy: Kennedy was having a horrendous year, and that was compounded by a knee injury in August, ending his season.

3B - Scott Rolen: The perennial Gold Glover was never right in '07, as he continued to struggle with a shoulder that had been operated on twice. The shoulder progressively got worse, leading to his worst season in baseball. He was shut down in early September.

SS - David Eckstein: Eckstein missed nearly a month with a back injury, and he has struggled with it most of the year.

LF - Chris Duncan: The left fielder had a great first half, but was awful after the All-Star break. As it turns out, he had a sports hernia and underwent season-ending surgery.

CF - Jim Edmonds: Jimmy Ballgame started the year at less than 100%, and he was never fully healthy. He suffered from a pinched nerve in his lower back and missed more than a month of action.

RF - Juan Encarnacion: Encarnacion started the year on the D.L. as he recovered from offseason wrist surgery. A freak accident saw him get hit in the eye by a foul ball while standing in the on-deck circle in August. Not only did that end his season, it may end his career. Cardinals team doctor George Paletta called it, "the worst trauma I've seen."

Pitchers

SP - Chris Carpenter: As mentioned above, Carpenter pitched 6 innings before his season was over. 2008 is in jeopardy as well.

SP - Mark Mulder: Mulder started the year on the D.L. after having rotator cuff surgery last season. He pitched in a few games this year before shutting it down due to soreness. It was recently learned he must undergo another operation on the shoulder, ending his year.

SP - Braden Looper: The surprisingly effective Looper suffered from tendinitis in July, landing him on the D.L.

SP - Mike Maroth: After being blasted in start after start, Maroth went on the disabled list with what was called elbow tendinitis.

RP - Tyler Johnson: Johnson, a valuable lefty out of the pen, missed nearly two months with a shoulder injury.

RP - Josh Kinney: Kinney's season was over before it began. After serving an important role in the bullpen in the '06 postseason, Kinney had Tommy John surgery before spring training.

RP - Todd Wellemeyer: Wellemeyer was a mid-season addition who was used as both a starter and reliever. He missed a chunk of time due to a sprained elbow.

RP - Josh Hancock: As most people know, Hancock passed away due to a drunk driving accident in April.

Bench Players

OF - Preston Wilson: Wilson played in just a handful of games before going down for the season with a knee injury. The injury may end his career.

UTIL - Scott Spiezio: Not only did Spiezio miss time due to injury, he also missed five weeks while undergoing treatment for substance abuse.

In total, that makes 18 players who have had to miss time this year, including every member of their starting line-up and their two best pitchers.

Is there anyone else who just realized that the National Hockey League has officially begun? Amidst playoff races in baseball and the start of the National Football League, hockey is here anew.

In case you do not remember, the Stanley Cup was won last season by Anaheim ... I'm pretty sure.

Practices and training camps have begun across North America. In fact, there have even been exhibition games! Not to mention cuts are being made and rosters are filling out.

The regular season begins in two weeks, so here is my NHL preview:

- MVP: Paul Kariya
- Rookie of the Year: Erik Johnson
- Vezina Trophy: Manny Legace
- Stanley Cup: St. Louis Blues

Even though hockey isn't exactly my forte, I do follow the Blues and watch some games here and there. It would help tremendously if all the games were in hi-def, but I'd be satisfied just to be able to watch the Blues without having to go past channel 600 on DirecTV.

Either way, gear up - another hockey season is just around the corner for most Americans to ignore.

Those of us who caught HBO's Real Sports program were lucky enough to catch a story about a man who managed to succeed against the odds. And that man certainly wasn't Donovan McNabb.

HBO's piece on McNabb, done by James Brown (who also hosts CBS' NFL Today program) was largely an apologetic piece of fluff. Brown chronicled McNabb's upbringing in the suburbs of Chicago, and how he was one of the few African-Americans in the area. McNabb even detailed the fact he got into a fight or two when he was young. Welcome to childhood, Donovan. Is there anybody who didn't get into fights as a kid? Getting your nose bloodied is part of growing up. McNabb acts like it is a novel concept.

McNabb then went on to spit his drivel about how black quarterbacks have it so much tougher than white quarterbacks, though when asked, he offered no empirical evidence. Maybe Donovan hasn't been paying attention to the treatment of Rex Grossman, or Jets fans cheering when Chad Pennington got injured, or the criticism leveled at Eli Manning on a weekly basis.

That wasn't the only way McNabb came off poorly. In one instance, Brown was narrating over game film about the lack of talent around McNabb. While Brown was doing this, there was a shot of McNabb missing a wide open Kevin Curtis in the end zone by a good seven or eight yards.

McNabb, the man who is one of the highest profile athletes in the country, who does soup commercials and penned a $100 million contract, even admitted that sometimes he wonders, "why me?"

The story that followed made McNabb seem like the quintessential whiny, spoiled, American athlete.

It was about a young man named Lopez Lomong, who was from the African nation of Sudan. When he was six years old, he and the rest of the children from his village were kidnapped by Sudanese rebels, who were going to turn them into child soldiers.

Lomong wound up in one of their camps, and the surroundings were not pleasant. He explained that 100 boys stayed in a single room, with no plumbing, electricity or windows. Boys had little to eat or drink, so they were slowly dying from dysentery.

He and three other boys managed to escape through a tiny hole, and they ran for three days, straight into Kenya, where he spent the next ten years in a refugee camp.

Eventually, after what amounted to winning an essay contest, he was selected to go to America and live in Syracuse, New York, with two white people he had never met before. In essence, he was getting a new family and a chance to start a new life, even though he was afraid of basic things like electricity, which he had never seen before.

Soon, he started to run track in high school, and he wound up at Northern Arizona University, where he recently won national tile in the 1,500 meter race.

Shortly after, Real Sports took him back to his home in Africa. There, he met two brothers for the first time, and saw his mom and dad for the first time in 17 years. They were living in poor conditions, in tiny rooms they called apartments, and if you wanted to use the water, you had to boil it. Nobody had shoes and the road was made of dirt.

Lopez Lomong recently became an American citizen, and he hopes to compete in the Olympics, though his main goal is to bring his brothers to America so they can run.

And if they're lucky, Donovan McNabb can share his sob story. Maybe they'll learn what it's like to really have it tough.

The best of the Tuesday sports blogs, including Rachel Bilson.

- The Lions are 2-0, so Rupert is ecstatic, and celebrates with a Prince/Detroit Lions montage. (Ghosts of Wayne Fontes)

- Who was this week's College Negro QB of the week? (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- Some of college football's best players are out with injury. (Pre Pro Sports)

- Shaun Alexander explains what happened between he and Matt Hasselbeck that led to the Seahawks loss against Arizona. (Shakedown Sports)

- You'll have a hard time believing this girl is a Mixed Martial Arts fighter. (Epic Carnival)

- In case you were wondering what the top sports stories in Japan were, just click the link. (With Malice)

- Greg Oden potentially danced himself to injury. (100% Injury Rate)

- MBSR lists some of their more tender moments, including pet names, Disney and man hugs. (My Brain Says Rage)

- Taco Bell to Charlie Weis: it is Nacho Day. Get it? Like, "not your day" ... but with nachos. (We Are The Postmen)

Tuesday means it's time to peruse the sports message boards to see what kind of douchebaggery is sprouting up.

ESPN.com - NFL Board: "Can any black players speak well? Watching Emmitt Smith and Keyshawn on ESPN is brutal. Can anyone except Tiki Barber speak well? That is why I like that guy - he is a refreshing image of a black NFL player that isnt seen nearly enough."
- 33Tony33Dorsett33

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "Why Does OJ Keep Getting Set Up? First the racist LAPD sets him up for the murder of his x-wife, and now he's being set up for stealing his own stuff? What gives?" - orngandblu

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "why is everyone downgrading michigan? just becuse michigan losees 2 games you guys start to jump them if this was a different school no one would even care but listen up im promise a win next week and then a big ten title at the end of the season. go blue" - judebham

GangGreen.com - NY Jets: "It starting to look like that EM was only a good coach because of the the schedule last year. I'm not a big Eric fan and never was when they 1st got him. I'm not saying fire him but what happens when we play good teams? That what you measure a coach by." - #1 Jets Fan

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "USC is overrated ... if you watched the game between your trojans and NU then please be honest when you post things! i have the game recorded and can send you a copy of the game! i watch all top 10 games every week and i record them." - mrkmaye23

Igglephans.com - Philadelphia Eagles Board: "fucc the BORING ASSED west coast offense,fucc the eagles front office, fucc kevin curtis, and fucc the guy who said I was fuccin crazy to think we lose the game.."they're giving 7 pts, vegas doesn't mess around with pointspreads" HAHHAHHHAAAHAHAHAH" - Philaphornia Machete Mouf

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "IF MICH beats PSU I say they re-enter the top 25." - Fredm333

ESPN.com - NFL Board: "I just think it's weird how all these black QB's always seem to be the ones with 'no recievers' or talent around them.

It's all them all the time.

McNabb, Young, Vick, etc.

Why is it that only black QB's have no help on offense?" - Unbiased Poster

HomeRunDerby.com: "F*ck moises alou, his brain must have turned to cream of wheat, that mushy-buttocked lube farter. He just wanted an excuse if/when he (inevitably) failed. You have a built-in excuse now f*cktard. And you have essentially destroyed a man. F*cking **** bastard.
Oh, and Mark Prior takes it up the dirty turkey highway." - patrick

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "why is everyone downgrading michigan? just becuse michigan losees 2 games you guys start to jump them if this was a different school no one would even care but listen up im promise a win next week and then a big ten title at the end of the season. go blue" - judebham

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "THANK YOU NICK SABEN.

THANK YOU MAJUR APPELWITE

THANK YOU REST OF BAMA STAFF.

NO DIFINSE CAN STOP US.

ROLLLLLLLL TIDE ROLLLLLLLL" - SKSsDad

For many St. Louisians, this was to be glorious sports weekend. The rival Chicago Cubs were coming to town to play the Cardinals, the Rams were taking on the San Francisco 49ers at home, the St. Louis Blues (FYI: they're a hockey team - look it up) started their exhibition schedule on home ice, and tens of people were excited about something called the Tour of Missouri, which is exactly like the Tour De France - without the mountains.

No matter what, this had to be better than last weekend, didn't it? Apparently not. If last Friday thru Sunday was a punch in the gut, this weekend was a direct kick in the nuts - with steel toed boots.

The Cardinals were playing the Cubs on a four-game homestand, representing their final shot at making a playoff run. They had lost seven straight going into the series, and realistically needed a sweep to get back into contention. They proceeded to lose three out of four.

Making it especially painful, ex-Cardinal hurler Jason Marquis beat them on Sunday. Although Marquis knows everything there is to know about pitching (just ask him), it seems he is actually listening to Cubs pitching coach Larry Rothschild, much to the shock of Cardinal Nation.

The Blues (again - hockey team) opened their exhibition on Sunday night, and they proceeded to lose 3-1 to the Atlanta Thrashers. First exhibition games in any sport don't generally mean much, but coach Andy Murray wasn't buying it. His post-game comments to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch included him saying most of the team was average and that they were careless. His highest praise went to the former number one overall draft pick, defenseman Erik Johnson: "(He) was one of our more positive defensemen ... he would have graded out at average and the other guys were below average."

Finally, the biggest debacle of the weekend belonged to the St. Louis Rams. They didn't play terribly, but they were coached terribly by Scott Linehan and company in a 17-16 loss to the San Francisco 49ers. The team is now 0-2 and dead last in the NFC West.

Overall, the team played decently but for a few key mistakes - Torry Holt fumbled the ball and it went out of bounds at the goal line - giving the 49ers the ball at the 20 - and Dante Hall muffed a punt deep in Rams territory to set up the game winning field goal by San Francisco.

The coaching errors were beyond comprehension. They failed to get Steven Jackson the ball enough, particularly in the fourth quarter, and after one particular series he stormed off the field, screaming at the coaching staff.

In the fourth quarter, on what would have been the winning drive, Linehan had Bulger spike the ball at midfield, though the Rams had over a minute left to work with. One sack later, it was third and seventeen. A fourteen yard pass set up a Jeff Wilkins 56 yard field goal attempt, and he came up about six inches short.

Furthermore, Bulger nearly got decapitated, as he was sacked six times, and took at least ten more crushing hits. He winced in pain through the entire second half, but still performed admirably, throwing for 368 yards. Apparently, they weren't prepared for what the 49ers did, as guard Mark Setterstrom offered this opinion: ""We had a little bit of trouble identifying things. I'm sure part of their package was confusion. ... Going into the game, we had a couple of people we were supposed to be looking at, and they kind of changed their scheme up a little bit." Way to make adjustments, coaches.

Needless to say, Rams fans are pissed.

The scribes also had a field day with Linehan, rightfully skewering his decisions. Post-Dispatch columnist Bryan Burwell offered these thoughts:

"How do you expect to win games with an offense that seems hellbent on getting its quarterback dismembered and its featured running back stark raving mad over his inexplicable lack of use in the crunch? ... Welcome to the Nightmare on Broadway, a recurring horror story filled with rotten pass-blocking, incomprehensible play-calling decisions and Sunday afternoon bouts of amnesia in the coach's booth ... Lots of odd play calls. Lots of needless hits on Bulger. Lots of misuse of Jackson, who touched the ball only three times the entire fourth quarter."

His colleague at the P-D, Bernie Miklasz, had a similar reaction:

" Linehan seemed lost (again) on the sideline. I don't even want to get into it; to list all of the things that went wrong, I'd need the Library of Congress to catalogue it. But in terms of game management and handling the clock, Linehan made Mike Martz look like Vince Lombardi ... The offense is down to one touchdown a game, and confusion still reigns, but at least Linehan is a nice guy who plays well with others ... Playoffs? At this point, I'd be grateful if the Rams just made it to the end zone ... Two games into the season, the storyline is set: Shaw and Zygmunt's young coach is under fire, and with six of the next eight games on the road, he must avoid becoming the next Rich Brooks. The Internet domain name, firescottlinehan.com, is available for $100."

So it was that kind of weekend for sports fans in St. Louis, and unless things get better, quickly, it could be an awfully long winter on the banks of the Mississippi.

DOTD is taking a well-deserved break. See you Monday.

The best of the Thursday sports blogs, including Victoria Silvstedt.

- Sooze (unfortunately) didn't win a date with Alyssa Milano, but she did win a baseball with Alyssa's autograph on it. (Babes Love Baseball)

- Rae and Steg may hate Epic Carnival, but at least they like me! (My Brain Says Rage)

- Chargers vs. Pats is GOWF's game of the week. (Ghosts of Wayne Fontes)

- Stephon Marbury is an odd cat. (Sons of Sam Malone)

- Bill Belichick is not the only one in sports who sucks at espionage. (Epic Carnival)

- Who to start and who to sit for your college fantasy football team. (Pre Pro Sports)

- The best hits at the Rugby World Cup. (With Malice)

- The Falcons owe it to the community of Atlanta to sign Byron Leftwich. (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- Brazil soccer fans? Yeah, they love their team. (More Credible)

The New England Patriots and their head coach were caught cheating, which makes them seem like they lack a basic fundamental human trait: integrity. That's not surprising, considering their head coach, Bill Belichick, is a man who would sell his children to the highest bidder if it guaranteed him another Super Bowl win.

And yes, Patriots fans (some of you, at least), we know it's just the evil media and jealous fan bases making this a much bigger story than it is. Because Billy Belichick can do no wrong. Look, you and Bill Simmons can make your excuses, but just know you're exactly the same as the folks in San Francisco (some of them) who will cling to the notion that Barry Bonds has never done steroids.

The Patriots have long been suspected of cheating, but like many other sports, football is a fraternity, and unless you knew something for a fact, you didn't reveal you suspicions. Since the Patriots were caught in the act of videotaping other teams signals, nobody had to snitch on them. And now, players across the league are opening up.

Still, the question remains: how long, and for which games were the Patriots cheating the National Football League and the rest of America?

There's one entity that can bring the truth to the masses: ESPN. No other enterprise in sports has as much power as the four-letter. They can elevate or destroy an athlete or coach's reputation with one story. When ESPN talks, people do listen, even if they don't always agree with what they say.

In the world of blogging, ESPN is the single most popular target. It is a tired subject, but this situation is one that bears watching. Will the network use it's vast resources to delve into this story? Will they do everything in their power to find out how deep this cheating went? Or will they sit on their laurels, as partners of the NFL, afraid to dig up the past in fear of angering the almighty National Football League?

Since players have now started to talk, ESPN needs to hit this hard, and go full bore. Local newspaper reporters have started doing this, and now ESPN should follow suit.

Among the players already talking:

Packers QB Brett Favre: "I think we say that near about every game they play in," Favre said of playing a perfect game. "One game in particular - I watched the Minnesota game because we were playing them the following week or two weeks later - they were just flawless."

Steelers WR Hines Ward: "When we played them in the championship game, it seemed like they were a step ahead of us all the time. You never know how long they've been doing this stuff ... You hate to see it come to putting an asterisk by their championships, but I haven't heard of any other team doing something like this. I wouldn't put it past them."

Jaguars DE Paul Spicer: "I've heard something like that a long time ago. Surprised it just now comes out in the open."

Giants DE Michael Strahan: "When I heard about that, I said, ‘Whoa, how long have they been doing that?’ Stealing signals? That’s pretty heavy, man. I don’t know if that’s much different than the cheating ref in basketball. It just makes you wonder how long they’ve been doing this and has it really helped them win some games? And if they’ve been doing it in those games that they won Super Bowls in or won playoffs in. It does make you wonder. Because that team has won some big games."

ESPN has the resources to do what no newspaper, website or local television station can do. Expose the truth. Let America know if the Patriots are a legitimate dynasty or a tainted one. Will they do what a news organization should in a story this big, or will they cower in fear of the NFL? We'll find out soon enough.

When the Chicago Bears and Indianapolis Colts played in the Super Bowl last February, there was a lot on the line - championship rings, pride ... and tickets to see Neil Sedaka.

There is a lame wacky tradition in American sports where championship games and series are bet on by the two mayors representing those cities. And in the last Super Bowl, Chicago Mayor Richard Daley made a bet with Indianapolis Mayor Bart Peterson, who accepted the wager.

Mayor Daley went the usual route, betting food items from around Chicago, along with clothing and even Bears colored furniture. But Indianapolis' Mayor Peterson upped the ante, offering local cuisine, but also an exclusive package of tickets to three events: the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, the Big Ten Basketball Championship, and the Indianapolis Symphony Orchestra ... featuring Neil Sedaka!

Now, it seems, this tradition has reached all the way across the ocean to our friends in the Utopian paradise of North Korea.

Seven or eight of you may know that the Women's World Cup is going on right now in China. Apparently, the games are on sometime in the middle of the night. Or so we're told.

One of the first matches of the tournament featured the United States playing North Korea. That game ended in a 2-2 tie, and let's just say North Korean coach Kim Kwang-min was less than impressed with the American squad:

"The U.S. is the best in the world, but today they didn't perform to their maximum. This gave us a chance to see our level, and if we meet the Americans a next time we will have the tactics to beat the Americans."

What most people probably didn't know is that North Korean ruler Kim Jong-il wrote a letter to President George Bush, offering to make a friendly wager on the game. Unfortunately, Bush declined, saying he had other things on his mind at the moment - wars, terrorism and the like.

However, DOTD has obtained the only known copy of this document from our contacts in North Korea - in exchange for a single potato. The following are the contents and terms of the wager Kim Jong-il proposed.

If the United States won, this is what Jong-il was going to give President Bush:

- Half of his $700,000 yearly supply of Hennessy.

- Exclusive access to one of North Korea's many "joy brigades" - which meant the use of each of the three teams employed there - the "satisfaction team," "happiness team," and "singing and dancing team."

- The use of one of his 7,000 Mercedes Benz S500 cars.

- Private one-on-one golf lessons with the Jong-il, to teach Bush how he consistently shoots three or four holes-in-one per round.

- Improving the quality of life for prisoners at the "education camp" known as Camp 22. Instead of stomping on the heads of babies born to the prisoners there, the infants will be allowed to survive on a work release program.

- Teaching Bush how to write six operas in two years, including choreography lessons.

Those are seemingly reasonable terms, and all Bush had to do was agree that if North Korea won the game, Kim Jong-il was to have received these amenities:

- The use of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan for one year in a joy brigade.

- His own movie studio, so he can add to his collection of 20,000 films.

- Since his personal film director escaped, Steven Spielberg must be deported to North Korea. Along with Spielberg, Sylvester Stallone also must be deported, so he can re-enact scenes from Rambo, one of Jong-il's favorite films, every day for the rest of his life.

- Bush must also give Jong-il complete control of the NBA, so the "Dear Leader" can watch his favorite sport at any time he pleases. He will also change the rules to more closely follow that of the rules Jong-il enacted - a dunk is worth three points, a three-pointer that is all net is worth four points, and any basket in the last three seconds of the game? That's worth eight points. Along with being penalized for missing a free throw - that's minus one point.

- He also wrote in a P.S. that if Bush wanted to go ahead and throw in some uranium, that would be okay too.

So, all America would have had to give up was Linday Lohan, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Sylvester Stallone, Steven Spielberg and the NBA. However, since the game ended in a 2-2 tie, even if the two men made the bet, it would have been nullified. But, that's soccer for ya'.

Time for the weekly look around the world of sports internet message boards in our regular edition of Message Board Marauder.

ESPN.com - MLB Board: "ROIDROD: When will people start calling him out? I mean come on meng! This dude is obviously on the JUICE! Media needs to start taking it's job seriously and calling him out." - Koban717

ESPN.com - College Football Board: "Statistics prove it. The Big East is superior to the SEC." - jth1970

ESPN.com - NFL Board: "Raiders sign the Black Jared Lorenzen. Huge waste of money on a huge tub of lard." - JaMarcus_will_Bust

NotreDameFans.com: "DON'T PANIC!! There is much to be optimistic about. When you think about it, the only problem, though admittedly a huge one, is the offensive line. When you think about it, that's the only real serious problem on this team right now." - Bernie P. ND '74

WingedHelmet.com - Michigan Football: "Is Pete Carroll available? I'll take Pete even without his Southern California recruiting advantage. He clearly can outcoach our coaches and out recruit them most of the time." - kurtbri

BigHuskerFan.com - Nebraska Football: "USC is going to come in over confident and won't give this game much respect. If we play mistake free and Keller finds his rhythm I think we can win."
- Hawkeyehusker

ESPN.com - MLB Board: "SOX OWN BASEBALL ... BOW DOWN TO THE ALMIGHTY SOX!" - JERMAINEDYE4MVP

TideSports.com - Alabama Board: "As a student, I attended every home game from 1975 to 1979. Two hours before kickoff, I would watch Coach Bryant walk the team around the field and tip his hat as he passed the student section. This would bring near tears to my eyes, every week, it never subsided. I loved Coach Bryant, what he stood for and what he did for the University of Alabama. It definitely was a special feeling." - CrimsonFJR

DodgerBlues.com: "Dear Ned: Grow a fucking pair and fire Little, in fact, throw him off the plane without a parachute. He's the only reason why this team will not make the playoffs, in fact probably the reason why they don't have the best record in the NL." - Atlas

The best of the Monday sports blogs, including Carmen Electra rocking a bikini perfectly. At one point in my life I would have been happy to show you Britney Spears in a thong, but now that's just disgusting.

- A brillian idea. The Roger Wehrli Award - named after the St. Louis Cardinals football player, Hall of Famer and resident of DOTD's hometown - recognizing the best white cornerback of the week in the NFL each week. (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- The Redskins had an interesting game - and one of those pricey, underachieving free agents from a year ago actually contributed. (My Brain Says Rage)

- Find out what kind of action Adrian Peterson will get for his performance on the field this week. Jason Elam and Veteran Lady Muff was an appropriate choice. (More Credible)

- Pac-Man Jones: Champion of TNA Wrestling. (Six Pack Sports Report)

- Some whore has written a book on how to bag yourself a Nascar driver. You know, if you're into that sort of thing. (Deuce Of Davenport)

- Isiah Thomas is getting sued, but does anyone care? (Signal To Noise)

- Jose Valverde = Jackass (Babes Love Baseball)

- Just Call Me Juice leaves the blogosphere for good. (Just Call Me Juice)

- The Sporting Orange reveals what Jon Gruden's day was like yesterday in Seattle, in an hour-by-hour account. (The Sporting Orange)

- Who will be the A.L. Rookie of the Year? (The Extrapolater)

If you do, the entire city of St. Louis would like to borrow it and a DeLorean, in hopes of somehow altering the outcomes of the city's wretched weekend of sports.

Of all the possible scenarios that one could have imagined concerning the Rams and Cardinals, nobody would have guessed this one. It wasn't just that the Rams lost at home, or that the Cardinals got swept in Arizona that hurt. It was how they lost, combined with off the field issues and key players getting injured. Let's painfully review the weekend, and give a bit of the media's perspective on things.

- Rick Ankiel: By now, we all know that the former comeback kid was linked to receiving HGH in Florida in 2004. No, HGH wasn't banned by baseball in 2004, and he stopped receiving it when it did get banned, but the feel-good story of the 2007 baseball season was ruined.

After that came his "denial", where he claimed he did nothing wrong. Problem was, it wasn't really a denial at all, and it sounded a whole lot like somebody else that Cardinal Nation is familiar with when Ankiel said, "I'm not going into the list of what my doctors have prescribed for me ... There are doctor-patient privileges, and I hope guys respect those privileges."

Bryan Burwell of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch offered his take on the proceedings, which I wholeheartedly agree with:

"We wanted the truth and could have handled the truth. But all Ankiel did was sound like every other suspect in this era of designer drugs and chemically enhanced magic. He covered his tracks in the murkiness of another wishy-washy non-denial denial. It wasn't quite, 'I'm not here to talk about the past,' but it was close enough for my discomfort."

- Cardinals Swept: After Ankiel's press conference, the Cardinals still had a three-game series with the Arizona Diamondbacks to complete. And they proceeded to blow all three games. After a close game that culminated in a 4-2 loss on Friday, the Cardinals seemed primed to take Saturday's game. Until they blew a 7-3 lead and ended up losing 9-8.

Post-Dispatch writer Joe Strauss offers this commentary:

"If Saturday night's action at Chase Field didn't set the game back 40 years, it at least took the Cardinals back to the bad old days of May."

Then on Sunday, the Cards blew a 4-2 lead, and ended up getting swept out of the Arizona desert. As if that weren't bad enough, word comes that left fielder Chris Duncan is probably out for the year with a hernia. Duncan became the fifth significant player to go down due to injury, joining Chris Carpenter, Adam Kennedy, Juan Encarnacion and Scott Rolen.

- Rams Lose To Panthers: After an off-season dedicated to putting some new pieces into the offense, defense and special teams, expectations were pretty high around St. Louis concerning the Rams. That lasted all of one half of football, as the Carolina Panthers ran through and around them to win by a two touchdown margin, 27-13. Good teams don't lose by fourteen points at home to anybody, much less a Panthers team that was 8-8 last year and isn't exactly a juggernaut. I'm not saying Carolina isn't a good team. They obviously are. But not fourteen points better, especially not at home.

How did this happen? Well, the run defense was it's usual self, allowing 186 yards on the ground at 4.9 yards per carry. DeAngelo Williams and DeShaun Foster were running through holes bigger than Paris Hilton's ... uh, nevermind. You get the picture. The gaps were huge.

Offensively, Marc Bulger was not his usual accurate self, and Steven Jackson, after losing just two fumbles all of last year, lost two fumbles in the third quarter alone, which killed the Rams. After which, Post-Dispatch columnist Bernie Miklasz offered this perspective on the running back:

"Perhaps Jackson will better understand that to be considered great, you have to do more than have one big season. You have to do more than promote yourself. You have to do more than take cheap shots at Marshall Faulk in interviews. And you have to avoid fumbling."

But Jackson wasn't the entire problem. The entire offense was out of rhythm, and then to cap it all off, Orlando Pace got hurt in the second quarter, suffering what coach Scott Linehan deemed, "A pretty bad sprain." Though Pace was injured, and that was a blow, there was no reason to completely buckle in the second half. The play-calling by offensive coordinator Greg Olson was especially brutal, which led Burwell to question what the coaching staff was doing:

"The problem with the Rams' offense isn't coping with Life After Orlando. It's coping with coaches who keep forgetting how committed they have to be to sticking with a game plan that realizes that you have to keep feeding Jackson the ball. It's coping with coaches who have brain cramps too often, where they forget about how and why this offense should work like a dream almost every Sunday."

So, the Cardinals season is slowly slipping away, and should they lose the division by one or two games, all they have to do is look back to the weekend of September 7-9 to see where it went wrong. Likewise, the Rams have gotten off to as a poor a start as anyone could have dreamed. Granted, it's one game, and there are fifteen more to play. But the NFL only has 16 games. And losing at home to a .500 team by two touchdowns is disconcerting, at best.

So, I'll ask again, anybody got that flux capacitor? And can you throw in 1.21 gigawatts while you're at it?

Sorry, Rick. It's time for you and I to go our separate ways. Because I'm not going through this crap again.

Graduating high school is always a daunting thing - life is usually never the same after that. And I did so in 1998. The summer of Sammy and Mark. It was a great summer. St. Louis, and the rest of the country, was caught up in the "Great Home Run Race." Then, a few years later, McGwire decided he wasn't going to talk about the past. In a strange way, that affected mine.

All the memories of friends and acquaintances and total strangers talking about how Mac was going to break Maris' record while we were all fixated to a television - they were suddenly flawed. The last summer of youth or innocence or whatever sappy adjective people use to describe the three months between being a high schooler and being a college student - damaged.

And that's Mark McGwire's fault. Because he didn't want to talk about the past.

Well, I'm a little older, a little wiser, and far more jaded now. With the news that Rick Ankiel has been tied to HGH, I must wish him farewell.

Suddenly, all his accomplishments are in question. And they should be.

Even though he wasn't a position player when he received HGH, and will probably say he was only using it because he was trying to recover from two arm surgeries and it was prescribed by a "doctor," I've still gotta say goodbye, Rick.

There have been too many times that I've had to be disappointed that an athlete I admired has been linked to using something pharmaceutical to enhance themselves. I'm tired of that. This is the last time it happens.

I'm not saying he's a bad person or he's fundamentally flawed or anything like that. I'm not saying I wouldn't have done the same thing if I was in his shoes. There's no anger or resentment or any of those feelings I had when McGwire testified. Because I just care less now about athletes.

I'm not going to boo Ankiel. I'm not going to scream "Cheater!" or any other put-down. Nor will I applaud.

I won't do anything.

And with that, I have to say goodbye, Rick.

The best of the Thursday sports blogs, including somebody named Coco. (Hat tip to: Scrap)

- WNBA MVP Lauren Jackson is kinda hot, especially in this picture. (Our Book Of Scrap)

- Forget Madden '08, a new football video game is destined to be much, much better. (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- Now that the NFL regular season has arrived, here are 11 stories that can go away, finally. (Five Tool Tool)

- Players to start or sit in your college fantasy football league. (Pre Pro Sports)

- How to make women's college volleyball the most profitable sport in the NCAA. (Epic Carnival)

- Is Derek Jeter still the face of the Yankees? (Bugs and Cranks)

When Andy Roddick lost to Roger Federer at the U.S. Open last night, it was the continuation of an unfortunate trend for him. Roddick's career record against Federer now stands at 1-14, for a .066 winning percentage.

While this news must be disconcerting for Roddick and his fans, there are some baseball fans who feel a similar despair when their teams play a certain opponent.

In honor of Roddick's wretched record, here is a look at the 10 worst winning percentages in head-to-head match-ups in Major League Baseball history.

(Criteria: Records from 1901 through 2007, with a minimum of 162 head-to-head games, in the regular season only. Data from BaseballReference.com)

1) Tampa Bay Devil Rays: 54-109, .331 vs. New York Yankees

2) Tampa Bay Devil Rays: 56-107, .344 vs. Boston Red Sox

3) Texas Rangers: 226-351, .392 vs. Baltimore Orioles

4) (Tie) Kansas City Royals: 167-244, .406 vs. New York Yankees and Texas Rangers: 236-345, .406 vs. New York Yankees

6) (Tie) Oakland/Philadelphia/Kansas City A's: 755-100, .407 vs. New York Yankees and Seattle Mariners: 174-253, .407 vs. Oakland A's

8) St. Louis Browns/Baltimore Orioles: 825-1193, .409 vs. New York Yankees

9) Washington Senators/Minnesota Twins: 760-1088, .411 vs. New York Yankees

10) Philadelphia Phillies: 762-1087, .412 vs. New York/San Francisco Giants

As you can see, the Yankees have proven to be problematic for some teams to beat. Those teams aren't alone, though. The Yankees have a .567 all-time winning percentage.

In fact, they have a .500 or better record against nearly every Major League franchise. Both the Los Angeles Dodgers and Cincinnati Reds have a 2-1 record against the Yankees, representing the only two teams with a winning record against them in regular season match-ups.

We have heard for most of this MLB season how bad the National League was. Even before the 2007 campaign began, pundits were opining on the relative gap in talent between the National League and the American League. And as it turns out, they were right.

Here is a look at the records and winning percentages of each division in their respective leagues.

National League

East: 343-350, .495
Central: 392-434, .475
West: 360-333, .519

Record thru 2,212 games: 1095-1117, .495

American League

East: 347-343, .503
Central: 343-348, .496
West: 288-265, .521

Record thru 1,934 games: 978-956, .506

As you can see, both of MLB's Central divisions are the worst, as the N.L. and A.L. Central combine for a .485 winning percentage. The N.L./A.L. East divisions are a bit better, as they combine for a .499 winning percentage, and the N.L./A.L. West divisions are easily the best, sporting a winning percentage of .520.

Of course, for all the mediocrity seen by both Central divisions recently, they have done remarkably well in postseason play of late. In the last five seasons (2002 thru 2006), teams from the N.L. and A.L. Central have made 10 appearances in the League Championship Series. The East divisions have 6 appearances, and the West divisions have 4.

On top of that, 5 teams from the Central divisions have been to the World Series in the last 3 years.

Despite this, it is clear that the National League has inferior teams. But why? One reason may be that there is more of them. There are 16 teams in the National League, and 14 in the American League.

Anybody who has complained about the state of baseball and poor pitching has cited at least one reason for this - expansion. Expansion teams mean more pitchers are in the Major Leagues who may not belong there.

So it goes to reason that if the National League has more teams, they have more of these arms. On the two extra National League teams, that's about 24 more pitchers that may not be in the Major Leagues if not for expansion. That is obviously not the sole reason for the difference between the two leagues, but it is a start.

So, what can be done about this? I offer two suggestions.

1) Move the Colorado Rockies from the N.L. West to the A.L. West and the Houston Astros from the N.L. Central to the N.L. West.

The Colorado Rockies have only been in existence since 1993, meaning they do not have much tradition or history with any of the other teams in the N.L. West. And because the A.L. West has just 4 teams, and the N.L. Central has 6 teams, moving a team into the A.L. West and out of the Central makes the most sense, and evens the number of teams in each league. And looking at this map of where all MLB teams are located, it would not be any extra inconvenience to either squad, as far as travel.

2) Contract the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, move the Washington Nationals into the A.L. East and the Pittsburgh Pirates into the N.L. East

Granted, this does not equal the two leagues out, as the N.L. would still have one more team, but it makes the most sense, logistically. There is no practical reason for Tampa Bay to have a baseball team. Their stadium is a joke, fans don't care (nor should they), and they have no realistic shot of contending in the A.L. East on a consistent basis.

Putting Washington into the East, with their shiny new stadium and sure to be significant payroll will create a natural rivalry with the Yankees and Red Sox, each vying for East Coast baseball supremacy. That would also move the Pirates out of the Central, where they do not belong in the first place, and put them in the same division as their Pennsylvania neighbors, the Philadelphia Phillies.

There is no question the National League is bad. And maybe realigning divisions or contracting teams isn't the answer. But something should be done to try and improve the game, even if it means shaking things up a little.

The best of the Tuesday sports blogs, including Ashley Lee, who you can bang if you are ever in Australia.

- Pac-Man Jones made some nice coin for standing around a wrestling ring. (100% Injury Rate)

- Awful Announcing is giving away an IPhone to the winner of an NFL Pick 'Em league. (Awful Announcing)

- Sad bikini news. The South Pacific Games is banning bikinis for female beach volleyball players. (Epic Carnival)

- Taking a look at A.L. East team names, and ranking them. (Gheorghe: The Blog)

- A hilarious, (though unfortunate) bowling accident from one of the MBSR crew. (My Brain Says Rage)

- NOIS gives blogfrica a new feature to peruse. Negro "College QB" of the Week. (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- A letter to Lloyd Carr. (Sons of Sam Malone)

- Some sex metaphors just don't work. (Why Don't We Get Drunk and Blog)

Tuesday's at DOTD mean that it's time to peruse the sports message boards and see what fans are spouting off about. Today, in light of the epic meltdown by Michigan's football team (which we saw, thanks to DirecTV), led by "head coach" Lloyd Carr, we will try and capture the true voice of Wolverines fans. And they're pretty pissed.

(Disclaimer: DOTD has never particularly liked Lloyd Carr. While we respect Michigan, Carr always came across as a grumpy, pompous old bastard. It has always amazed us that he got the players he did when they could probably be playing for someone who A) looked like he enjoyed breathing, and B) didn't have the personality of a Mr. Burns/Grinch evil clone.)

WingedHelmet.com: "F*ck, i think I'm going to get drunk...and F8ck the first drunk slut that will have me...night." - Ufers Spirit

MLive.com: "YOU People - I'm talking, of course, to those of you who will 'look on the bright side,' say 'it's all ok,' contend 'we're still playing for the Big Ten Championship,' or anything even remotely positive.

YOU are the reason this crap happens year in and year out. YOU are the reason Michigan Football has deteriorated to being a laughingstock, even if they win ALL their games the remainder of the season.

Your Liberal, feel good, let's just be happy we have a team, let's not be like those 'evil' Ohio State fans who expect championships attitude has allowed this BS to take place.

There needs to be an uprising to get rid of this coaching staff TODAY and some of the players, too.

If you have the attitude 'I'm stickin' with my guys,' YOU ARE AN IDIOT. The season is OVER.

I have come to hate Michigan Football since that LOSER has been the head coach and I will continue to hate Michigan Football until her leaves.

If anyone has any other attitude about this, he/she is a LOSER.

We suck. Any recruit considering Michigan should change his mind immediately. This program is a black hole and, until there is someone else as the head coach (NOT A 'MICHIGAN MAN'!!!!!!), this will continue." - MFanInATL

MichiganZone (A Michigan blog, not a message board, but these are comments from post-game): "I fucking hate you Lloyd Carr. I am so disappointed in myself, what with allowing my animosity towards you to lull last season. I wish you nothing but ill will.

I cried at Bo's passing; it will not be so for you.

Fuck you Lloyd. Retire, be fired, I don't care. Leave.

P.S.: We made the drudgereport. I hope your wife serves you with divorce papers tomorrow Lloyd. You are an embarrassment." - C

ESPN.com - Appalachian St. Board: "Listen, dont waste your gas money driving to Ann Arbor. The only thing you will see on Saturday in the Big House is Michigan running the score up on your sorry a$$. You guys think you can come to Ann Arbor and challenge us, man thats funny. Stick with what you do best, beat up on the 1-AA teams.

Michigan 49 - AS 14" - Morty222

WingedHelmet.com: "I don't think you can blame in on one specific group. This 2007 team is ful of vaginas, and it starts with the coaches. Ron English talks a lot of shit and tries to act tough, but he has been exposed. HIS defense got smacked around by OSU, USC and now a D-1A school. He is a fraud. Lloyd is...well Lloyd. VERY concerned about his legacy...well, the legacy is sealed. You are the worst National Championship coach in any sport." - annarbor5

UMGoBlue.com: "Bo Schembechler would be ashamed... no not of this team and not of this coaching staff, but of the supposed fans around here who have the audacity to talk about selling their tickets, abandoning their team, and throwing everyone associated with it under the bus. - scmgoblue

WingedHelmet.com: "FWIW, I still think we beat Ohio State. We just may not beat anyone else." - UMBOB1

MichiganZone: "Time to make myself a sundae topped with nails and battery acid! Enjoy your holiday weekend everyone!"
- jonjecz

WingedHelmet.com: "Simple request: Please don't use the term "Lloydball" anymore. It's a misnomer--Lloyd has no balls."
- Captain America

Scout.com: "Do you know what Lenoir-Rhyne is? Appalachian St.'s next opponent." - JimMcG

WingedHelmet.com: "What are message boards for then? so we can all do a type-written Kum-Bay-Yah after every game?"
- BlueCheeseHead

MichiganZone: "I have never been embarrassed to be associated with the Unversity of Michigan... until today. Way to go Coach Carr and the rest of the staff." - jeff

UMGoBlue.com: "hopefully oregon doesn't have a mobile QB.

hopefully michigan won't have to settle for field goals.

hopefully no one in the UM secondary will have to make an open field tackle." - pitt9496

Rivals.com: "Mark it down: On 9/3/07 @ 8:08 PM, the board hit a new low......A guy from UTEP -- I repeat -- The University of Texas at El Paso -- totally attempted to throw down on UM. Lloyd, what have you done to us?............" - NaplesGoBlue

With the minor league baseball season winding down, many of the first round picks from Major League Baseball's 2007 draft are completing their initial season of pro baseball. Soon, many of these players will head off to play in fall and winter instructional leagues to gain further experience. But before they do, let's take a look at how these players have fared in the earliest stage of their professional career.

(All statistics through Thursday, 8/30)

1. David Price, LHP - Tampa Bay Devil Rays

Price (pictured) has yet to suit up for a game since he signed his six-year, $11.25 million contract a few weeks ago. Reportedly, the Devil Rays want him to rest after throwing over 130 innings at Vanderbilt, where it wasn't uncommon for him to throw well over 100 pitches in a single outing.

2. Mike Moustakas, 3B/SS - Kansas City Royals

After signing a deal with a signing bonus of $4 million minutes before the deadline expired, Moustakas has played just 3 games. In 12 at-bats, he has 4 hits, including 1 double and 3 RBI.

3. Josh Vitters, 3B - Chicago Cubs

To say that Vitters is struggling is an understatement. The third baseman, who signed a deal that included a $3.2 million signing bonus, raised his minor league average 21 points after being moved from the Arizona Fall League to the Class A short season league. That would be great, except his average went from .067 to .088. He has just 3 hits in 34 at-bats, and has struck out 11 times compared to 2 walks.

4. Daniel Moskos, LHP - Pittsburgh Pirates

Being used in relief, the lefty has had mixed results to start his career. With only 11 2/3 innings under his belt, he has given up an earned run in all but one of his outings that lasted at least an inning. His overall ERA is 4.63, and he has struck out more than a batter an inning, with 12 on the season.

5. Matt Wieters, C - Baltimore Orioles

The former Georgia Tech catcher signed a deal with a $6 million signing bonus in the middle of August, but he has yet to suit up for an Orioles farm club. He will soon play in the Hawaii Winter League.

6. Ross Detwiler, LHP - Washington Nationals

The lanky, 6"5' Detwiler has started well for the Nats. His record is 2-2, as he has started 7 games and thrown 30 innings and given up 12 earned runs. His ERA would be much lower were it not for one game in which he allowed 7 earned runs in 2 2/3 innings. He also has 26 strikeouts and opponents are hitting .267 off of him.

7. Matt LaPorta, 1B/OF - Milwaukee Brewers

Since the Brewers already have some guy named Prince as their first baseman, LaPorta (pictured), a first baseman at Florida, has been playing the outfield - and mashing. In exactly 100 minor league at-bats, LaPorta has hit .310/.377/.670. He has 9 homeruns and 26 RBI as well. The only problem is the 28 strikeouts he has accumulated, which is far too many.

8. Casey Weathers, RHP - Colorado Rockies

Weathters has been outstanding so far in his young career. The righty has been used exclusively in relief, and in 12 2/3 innings, has 2.84 ERA, 2 saves, 19 strikeouts against 6 walks, and has held opponents to a .095 average.

9. Jarrod Parker, RHP - Arizona Diamondbacks

Parker signed a deal that gave him a signing bonus of $2.1 million, has yet to pitch in the minors, and will start throwing in the fall.

10. Madison Bumgarner, LHP - San Francisco Giants

Bumgarner also has yet to suit up in the minor leagues, though he did sign with the Giants.

11. Phillippe Aumont, RHP - Seattle Mariners

Aumont signed a deal with a $1.9 million signing bonus, but has not suited up yet in the minor leagues. He is currently playing for Canada at the America's World Junior Qualifying tournament.

12. Matt Dominguez, 3B - Florida Marlins

Dominguez has played just 7 games, and in those games he is hitting .107 with 3 hits in 28 at-bats, and only 1 walk.

13. Beau Mills, 3B - Cleveland Indians

Mills is already on his third different stop in his trek through the Indians' minor league system. He has 228 at-bats already, and is hitting .259/.331/.425, with 24 of his 59 hits going for extra bases.

14. Jason Heyward, CF - Atlanta Braves

The centerfielder has started will, going .302/.354/.488, with 5 doubles and 1 homerun among his 13 hits.

15. Devin Mesoraco, C - Cincinnati Reds

Mesoraco has struggled at the plate, hitting just .219/.310/.270. He only has 5 extra base hits among his 30 total, and he has struck out 26 times in 137 at-bats.

16. Kevin Ahrens, 3B - Toronto Blue Jays

The 18 year old is having trouble finding his groove at the moment, hitting .230/.339/.321. He has struck out 47 times in 165 at-bats.

17. Blake Beavan, RHP - Texas Rangers

Beavan has signed a deal with the Rangers for a $1.5 million signing bonus, but has yet to appear in any minor league games.

18. Peter Kozma, SS - St. Louis Cardinals

Kozma (pictured) played his first game in the New York-Penn League last night, going 0 for 3. He is currently hitting .246/.333/.361, with 8 doubles and 2 homeruns among his 30 hits.

19. Joe Savery, LHP - Philadelphia Phillies

Having started 5 games, Savery has pitched well. He has a 2.75 ERA, and despite his 1-2 record, he has allowed just 18 hits in 19 2/3 innings, and has struck out 15 batters against just 6 walks.

20. Chris Withrow, RHP - L.A. Dodgers

Withrow has no record to account for 6 appearances, including 4 starts. His ERA is 5.00, but he has allowed only 5 hits, as opponents are hitting just .167 against him. He also has 13 strikeouts and only 4 walks in 9 innings.

21. J.P. Arencibia, C - Toronto Blue Jays

Having already played 58 games, Arencibia is hitting .257/.309/.374, but has struck out 53 times compared to 55 hits.

22. Tim Alderson, RHP - San Francisco Giants

After reaching a deal the same day as Madison Bumgarner, one of the Giants other first-round picks, Alderson has performed. In 3 games, including 2 starts covering 5 innings, Alderson's ERA is 0.00, and he has 12 strikeouts and zero walks, as opponents are hitting .211 off him.

23. Nick Schmidt, LHP - San Diego Padres

In 7 innings, Schmidt has struggled, allowing 8 hits while walking 6. He also has 6 strikeouts and an opponents batting average of .286.

24. Michael Main, RHP - Texas Rangers

In 28 innings, Main has performed well. His ERA is 3.21, and though he has walked 13 hitters, he has struck out 34, and opponents are only hitting .212 off of him.

25. Aaron Poreda, LHP - Chicago White Sox

Poreda has been great early in his career. In 41 1/3 innings, including 7 starts, the lefty has an ERA of 1.09. He has allowed only 26 hits and 10 walks, while striking out 41. His opponents are hitting just .182 against him, and he has allowed only 1 homerun.

26. James Simmons, RHP - Oakland Athletics

In 13 games and 27 2/3 innings, mostly in relief, opponents are hitting .330 off of Simmons. He has struck out 24 against 8 walks, but he's allowed 38 hits and has an ERA of 4.88.

27. Rick Porcello, RHP - Detroit Tigers

The high school pitcher who many passed on because of his high price tag ($7 million), has yet to suit up in the minors. Porcello (pictured) is expected to start pitching in the fall.

28. Ben Revere, CF - Minnesota Twins

Revere has clearly had the best start among all first round picks. In 50 games, the centerfielder is hitting .325/.388/.461. He has shown his tremendous speed, as 10 triples are among his 62 hits. He has also stolen 21 bases and has struck out only 20 times in 191 at-bats.

29. Wendell Fairley, RF - San Francisco Giants

Fairley has signed a deal with a $1 million signing bonus, but will not start play until the fall.

30. Andrew Brackman, RHP - New York Yankees
After signing a deal with a $3.3 million signing bonus, Brackman will undergo ligament replacement surgery and is expected to miss 12-18 months.

A note to remember: The sample sizes (in terms of games played) of these players are quite small, as many did not sign until late. So whether the player is hitting .800 or .080, don't get too high or too down on them. Most still have a long way to go before you will see them in a Major League park.

Unless you live in a place like Pawtucket, Rhode Island, or Hoover, Alabama, you probably don't get the box scores for the previous day's minor league games in your morning newspaper.

Not only that, but there are so many leagues and teams, it can be a lenghty process to obtain the information you were seeking. With that in mind, we've decided to take a look at the farm clubs and put up the statistical leaders of every league in the minors thru High A.

And remember, with September call ups due in just a few days, you may be seeing these guys on your big league team soon - in fact, some of these players have already been called up.

(First team is minor league team, second is major league affiliate, unless minor league team has same name as major league team, i.e. Richmond Braves = Atlanta Braves)

International League - AAA

Batting Avg.
1. Ben Francisco - .320 (Buffalo Bisons - Cleveland)
2. Martin Prado - .319 (Richmond Braves)
3. Jose Morales - .315 (Rochester Red Wings - Minnesota)

Homeruns
1. Mike Hessman - 31 (Toledo Mud Hens - Detroit)
2. John-Ford Griffin - 26 (Syracuse Chiefs - Toronto)
3. Shelley Duncan - 25 (Scranton Yankees)

Wins
6 tied with 12

ERA
1. Kevin Slowey - 1.74 (Rochester Red Wings - Minnesota)
2. Garrett Olson - 3.16 (Norfolk Tides - Baltimore)
3. Ron Chiavacci - 3.39 (Toledo Mud Hens - Detroit

Saves
1. Bobby Korecky - 35 (Rochester Red Wings - Minnesota)
2. Chris Booker - 30 (Columbus Clippers - Washington)
3. Cory Doyne - 29 (Norfolk Tides - Baltimore)

Pacific Coast League - AAA

BA
1. Brian Myrow - .355 (Portland Beavers - San Diego)
2. Geovany Soto - .353 (Iowa Cubs)
3. Delwyn Young - .335 (Las Vegas 51's - Dodgers)

HR
1. Valentino Pascucci - 34 (Albuquerque Isotopes - Florida)
2. Craig Brazell - 32 (Omaha Royals)
3. Rick Ankiel - 32 (Memphis Redbirds - St. Louis)

W
1. R.A. Dickey - 12 (Nashville Sounds - Milwaukee)
1. Matt Kinney - 12 (Fresno Grizzlies - San Fran.)
3. 5 tied with 11

ERA
1. Jorge Campillo - 2.99 (Tacoma Rainiers - Seattle)
2. Dan Meyer - 3.28 (Sacramento River Cats - Oakland)
3. R.A. Dickey - 3.80 (Nashville Sounds - Milwaukee)

Saves
1. Ryan Speier - 32 (Colorado Springs Sky Sox - Colorado)
2. Chad Harville - 25 (Tucson Sidewinders - Arizona)
3. Brian Falkenborg - 23 (Memphis Redbirds - St. Louis)

Eastern League - AA

BA
1. Jordan Brown - .326 (Akron Aeros - Cleve.)
2. Brian Barton - .314 (Akron Aeros
3. Mark Kiger - .312 (Binghamton Mets)

HR
1. Jeffrey Larish - 26 (Erie SeaWolves - Detroit)
2. Michael Costanzo - 25 (Reading Phillies)
3. Brett Harper - 23 (Binghamton Mets)

W
1. Eddie Bonine - 14 (Erie SeaWolves)
2. Jeffrey Marquez - 14 (Trenton Thunder - N.Y. Yankees)
3. 2 tied with 12

ERA
1. Alan Horne - 2.91 (Trenton Thunder)
2. Jair Jurrjens - 3.20 (Erie SeaWolves)
3. Radhames Liz - 3.22 (Bowie Baysox - Balt.)

Saves
1. Brian Anderson - 28 (Connecticut Defenders - San Fran.)
2. Matt Peterson - 27 (Altoona Curve - Pittsburgh)
3. 2 tied with 23

Southern League - AA

BA
1. Javier Brito - .334 (Mobile BayBears - Ariz.)
2. John Jaso - .320 (Montgomery Biscuits - Tampa Bay)
3. Diory Hernandez - .312 (Mississippi Braves)

HR
1. Charlton Jimerson - 23 (West Tenn Diamond Jaxx - Seattle)
1. Brendan Katin - 23 (Huntsville Stars - Milwaukee)
3. Evan Longoria - 21 (Montgomery Biscuits - Tampa Bay)

W
1. Christopher Mason - 15 (Montgomery Biscuits - Tampa Bay)
2. Jack Egbert - 12 (Birmingham Barons - Chi. White Sox)
2. Matthew Green - 12 (Mobile BayBears - Seattle)

ERA
1. Christopher Mason - 2.53 (Montgomery Biscuits - Tampa Bay)
2. Jack Egbert - 2.89 (Birmingham Barons - Chi. White Sox)
3. Esmerling Vasquez - 3.02 (Mobile BayBears - Seattle)

Saves
1. Dale Thayer - 21 (Montgomery Biscuits - Tampa Bay)
2. Jonathan Meloan - 19 (Jacksonville Suns - L.A.)
3. Marino Salas - 17 (Huntsville Stars - Milwaukee)



BA
1. Chase Headley - .322 (San Antonio Missions - San Diego)
2. Christian Colonel - .312 (Tulsa Drillers - Colorado)
3. Freddy Sandoval - .305 (Arkansas Travelers - Anaheim)

HR
1. Colby Rasmus - 28 (Springfield Cardinals)
2. Ray Sadler - 24 (Corpus Christi Hooks - Houston)
3. German Duran - 22 (Frisco RoughRiders - Texas)

W
1. Joshua Geer - 15 (San Antonio Missions - San Diego)
1. Luis Mendoza - 15 (Frisco RoughRiders - Texas)
3. Eric Haberer - 13 (Springfield Cardinals)

ERA
1. Joshua Geer - 3.23 (San Antonio Missions - San Diego)
2. Miguel Gonzalez - 3.33 (Arkansas Travelers - Anaheim)
3. Cesar Ramos - 3.46 (San Antonio Missions)

Saves
1. Steven Register - 35 (Tulsa Drillers - Colorado)
2. Christopher Perez - 27 (Springfield Cardinals)
3. Jesse Ingram - 25 (Frisco RoughRiders - Texas)

California League - High A

BA
1. Bubba Bell - .370 (Lancaster JetHawks - Boston)
2. Aaron Bates - .332 (Lancaster JetHawks)
2. Zachary Daeges - .332 (Lancaster JetHawks)

HR
1. Tommy Everidge - 26 (Stockton Ports - Oakland)
2. Lucas May - 25 (Inland Empire 66ers of San Bernardino - L.A.)
3. 2 tied with 24

W
1. Brandon Hynick - 16 (Modesto Nuts - Colorado)
2. Alan Johnson - 13 (Modesto Nuts)
3. Matthew Buschmann - 12 (Lake Elsinore Storm - San Diego)

ERA
1. Brandon Hynick - 2.32 (Modesto Nuts - Colorado)
2. Brok Butcher - 2.69 (Rancho Cucamonga Quakes - Anaheim)
3. Matthew Buschmann - 2.85 (Lake Elsinore Storm - San Diego)

Saves
1. Daniel Stange - 16 (Visalia Oaks - Ariz.)
2. Chad Rhoades - 15 (Lancaster JetHawks - Boston)
3. Kyle Wilson - 14 (Inland Empire 66ers of San Bernardino - L.A.)

Carolina League - High A

BA
1. Mitch Einertson - .314 (Salem Avalanche - Houston)
2. Kala Kaaihue - .298 (Myrtle Beach Pelicans - Atlanta)
2. Matt Rogelstad - .298 (Potomac Nationals)

HR
1. Micah Schnurstein - 24 (Winston-Salem Warthogs - Chicago White Sox)
2. Kala Kaaihue - 22 (Myrtle Beach Pelicans - Atlanta)
3. 2 tied with 19

W
1. Rowdy Hardy - 15 (Wilmington Blue Rocks - K.C.)
2. Derek Rodriguez - 13 (Winston-Salem Warthogs - Chicago White Sox)
2. Shairon Martis - 13 (Potomac Nationals)

ERA
1. Rowdy Hardy - 2.43 (Wilmington Blue Rocks - K.C.)
2. Julio Cesar Pimentel - 2.78 (Wilmington Blue Rocks)
3. Daniel Cortes - 3.20 (Wilmington Blue Rocks)

Saves
1. Sung Ki Jung - 22 (Myrtle Beach Pelicans - Atlanta)
1. Scott Roehl - 22 (Kinston Indians - Cleveland)
3. Samuel Gervacio - 18 (Salem Avalanche - Houston)

Florida State League - High A

BA
1. Rhyne Hughes - .329 (Vero Beach Devil Rays)
2. Eric Nielsen - .323 (Dunedin Blue Jays)
3. Allen Craig - .312 (Palm Beach Cardinals)

HR
1. Jacob Butler - 23 (Dunedin Blue Jays)
2. Sergio Pedroza - 22 (Vero Beach Devil Rays)
3. Allen Craig - 21 (Palm Beach Cardinals)

W
1. Andrew Carpenter - 16 (Clearwater Threshers - Philadelphia)
2. Adam Ottavino - 12 (Palm Beach Cardinals)
3. 4 tied with 11

ERA
1. Joshua Outman - 2.45 (Clearwater Threshers - Philadelphia)
2. Jacob McGee - 2.93 (Vero Beach Devil Rays)
3. Adam Ottavino - 3.07 (Palm Beach Cardinals)

Saves
1. Eric Wordekemper - 31 (Tampa Yankees)
2. Connor Falkenbach - 30 (Dunedin Blue Jays)
3. 2 tied with 27

When you think of classic names in team sports, monikers such as Yankees, Packers and Canadiens come to mind. But what about teams outside the realm of major professional sports?

There are many small, independent sports leagues in every sport that most people are unaware of. And part of getting people to notice them is coming up with a unique name. Here is a look at some of the more interesting ones out there.

- Omaha Beef

The Beef play in the United Indoor Football League, which is a league made up of teams mostly in the Midwest. Basically, it is Arena Football, but a notch below. How can you tell that? Because the team finished the season about a month ago, but the schedule page on their website has them at 3 wins, 4 losses and 8 ties, with all the ties being 0-0. They do have a cool name for their mascot, who is a cow and goes by Sir Loin. Another thing to admire about them - their dance team, as you can tell by the picture. The name of that dance team? The Omaha Prime.

- Miami Vice Squad

The Vice Squad play in the National Indoor Football League, which is another lower level type of Arena League. They must be doing well, though, as they are expanding - and you can be a part of it. Just make a call to an 800 number, and you can have your own team!

- Lehigh Valley Outlawz

You really have to love these indoor football teams. The Outlawz play in the Continental Indoor Football League, and had a nice season, going 7-5. The name is definitely a good one, and though there are plenty of teams with the name Outlaws, this franchise gets the nod, as they spell it with the very hip "z" at the end, instead of the more traditional and feminine "s". Not only that, but Outlawz was the name of 2Pac's rap group.

- Traverse City Beach Bums

The Beach Bums are a part of the Frontier League, an independent baseball league. Seeing as how the team plays in Michigan, the name Beach Bums is unique, as Beach Bums is more often associated with people in California or maybe Hawaii. It is appropriate, though, as Traverse City is on the shore of Lake Huron. Incidentally, there is an island not too far north off shore from Traverse City called Beaver Island. Just a little FYI. Maybe Jessica Alba go to that beach, too.

- Edmonton Cracker-Cats

The Cracker-Cats are a baseball team that is part of the Northern League. They are currently having a tough year though, with a winning percentage of .349, worst in the league. The Cracker-Cats can take solace in the fact that they have a cool name, if that's any consolation to them.

- Bradenton Juice

While the name is a reference to Bradenton being the corporate headquarters of Tropicana, it still seems an odd choice for a baseball team. The Juice are a part of the South Coast League, made up of six teams in the southern U.S.

- New Jersey HitMen


What's better than referencing a state's affiliation with organized crime? The Eastern Junior Hockey League team seems very proud of it's name. Just check out the team's logo, featuring a man who is smoking a cigar, wearing a tidy suit and hat with sunglasses. This team is not to be confused with the XFL team in New Jersey of the same name.

Other notable team names:
-Georgia Gwizzlies (yes, with a "w") of the American Basketball Association
-Minnesota Ripknees of the Premier Basketball League
-Louisiana Swashbucklers of the Intense Football League
-Quad City Steamwheelers of the AF2 (Arena League minor league teams)
-Sarasota Millionaires of the Southern States Football League

The best of the Tuesday sports blogs, including Carmen Electra.

- Jerry Colangelo made a major mistake when he turned USA basketball over to "satan," a.k.a. Mike Krzyzewski. (Nation of Islam Sports Blog)

- Vivid, accurate description of a bloggers sudden writing block. (My Brain Says Rage)

- Remebering Drazen Petrovic. (The Blowtorch)

- Seattle manager John McLaren had a short night of work last night. (Babes Love Baseball)

- Top 10 WTF NBA moments in recent times. (Armchair GM)

- Australian Rules Football players don't want you to know about their illicit drug use. (Epic Carnival)

- The Yankees have quite a few overpaid players. (Big Show Baseball)

- The Sporting Orange updates us on their Florida blog, but much, much, much, much more importantly, they voluntarily include a picture of one of their smoking hot, ball-sweat inducing female compadres. (The Sporting Orange)

- While I won't go quite as far as Hank does, there are some possibly valuable members of the Oakland Raiders that could help your fantasy football team (hello, LaMont Jordan). If only they had a decent offensive line, though.... (Winning The Turnover Battle)

- A Seattle bar came up with a brilliant promotion - beers cost the same as Richie Sexon's batting average. (Home Run Derby)

Once again, it's time for our weekly look at internet message board douchebaggery.

ESPN.com - Nascar Board: "Dale Jr should retire. He totally sucks. Nascar is trying to make him a star and he is to stupid to make it. He is way overrated just like his Dad. Nascar fixed races so Sr. could win, they made more money that way." - LilChancie69

ESPN.com - NFL Board: "Pets should be illegal. I think that if the human race truly thinks about this Michael Vick situation, they will see that the true root of this problem is that people are allowed to keep animals as pets ... It is in most of man's instinct to eat meat, just like it is in most man's instinct to take on a wife. There are those strange people out there that decide to not eat meat or to date the same sex." - odogg2110

ESPN.com - Alabama Board: "Difference between Bama and auburn - BAMA GAT TRADISHUN AND THE BARN DON,T GAT NONE TRADISHUN.

ROLLLLLLL TIDE ROLLLLLLL" - SKSsDadcantpost

ESPN.com - NCAA Football Board: "Canadian over American girls. Our women are so much better looking and dont have that materialistic golddigger attitude that american women have."
- RogerCraigNU

BigHuskerFan.com - Nebraska Board: "Misery won't put up 24 on us. And we will put up 42 on them. Bank on it." - SCVHusker

SoonerFans.com - Oklahoma Board: "texass is WAYYYYY overhyped, sportswriters are more biased than ever ... Sportswriters, you all shouldn't be doing jack**** until you actually do some more in depth research on teams!!!!!!!"
- BASSooner

ESPN.com - SEC Board: "Bama will avg. 35 points per game. Thats right I said it. 35 points per game. Believe it! JPW is the best QB in the conference. We have the best group of WR's in the country and the best WR in the conference. The best o-lineman in the country and a kid at RB that nobody knows about who is going to be 2nd only the McF." - xersizeguy2006

WeAreSC.com - USC Board: "Exposed! Urban Meyer recruitment video. Recruits are submitted to endless loops of video with volume on high until verbal commitments are induced. Enjoy Moody." - S seaside

Miami-Hurricanes.com: "WTF ESPN! More proof they hate us these are all the Miami games they are showing on ESPN Classic in their 2 day long pregame for Thursday:

1984 Maryland at Miami
1995 Nebraska v Miami Orange Bowl
2003 OSU v Miami Fiesta Bowl
1998 VT v Miami

That's it, four games all of which we lost, Thanks ESPN!" - Canes122

If you're going to play a sports game nowadays, chances are it's going to be on a Playstation of X-Box. But it wasn't always like that. At one time, people used to play games that you had to take out of a box. You may or may not have partook in some of these games, but chances are you are at least familiar with them.

With that in mind, we will hop in the time machine and take a look at the best of the bunch.

Strat-O-Matic Baseball


You can still play Strat-O-Matic today, and in virtually any sport, but the best is Strat-O-Matic Baseball. The gist of the game is simple. Every MLB player (you can buy every player or just a single season) has a unique card based on their skill set. Basically, dice are rolled, there is a corresponding result on the card, and so on. This game has been, and still is, wildly popular. Of course, there are also versions that can be played on the computer now.

Bas-ket


Bas-ket is an old game that has 6 holes on either side of the court, and two baskets. The floor is angled so the ball will drop into one of the holes. Spring loaded levers are pulled, and it must be done with the right amount of touch to get the ball through the hoop.

Electric Football


Electric Football is a game where you put all the men on the magnetic field, turn it on, and the field vibrates. When the game was initially released, there was virtually no control of the players. They just went wherever - backwards, forwards, sideways. Now, there are controls allowing game players to control their men. This game is still a very popular, as there is an Electric Football Convention every year the weekend before the Super Bowl. This year's will be January 25-27 in Detroit. (Thanks to Ira Silverman of Silverman Media & Marketing for the info.)

Table Top Hockey


There are many different versions of this, including Pro Action Hockey and, of course, bubble hockey. This is not air hockey, but a version where a big plastic puck is dropped, and rods move each player. There is no area on the ice that a player can't get to, and wicked slapshots are common, as is the puck sailing 20 feet away from the board.

Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots


Is there anyone who didn't love Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots? Simple enough concept. Grab the joystick, stick and move until one of the boxer's heads popped up, signaling the loser. Still great today.

This headline seems like it could have been worded differently.